Recently as I finished up another glorious day of being Jarrod, I received an unexpected yet welcome surprise. After finishing a long and easy swim practice, my coach handed me a letter of recruitment. At first I was excited that the Ivy League Universities were finally noticing my immense talent as an individual, an athlete, and a god. Then, I looked where the letter was from.
Oh well, safety schools are good too
However, upon thinking upon the issue for some time, I realized that there were no bad schools and that it truly was a shame how only one school could have an individual as amazing as me. So, if you, my faithful follower, have been adhering to the teachings of Jarrod-ism, you may well be faced with the same problem that I will inevitably face - too many college acceptances. When you do face this problem, be sure to solve it in a manner that complies with the principles of Jarrod-ism.
1) Once you receive your 15 or so acceptances, place the acceptance letters of the Colleges you are NOT going to (such as Harvard, Yale, Dartmouth, Brown, RISD, Columbia, Cornell, Princeton, and Caltech) on your school's wall of rejection. After all, you ARE rejecting those colleges.
I'd go to Asian hell for turning this down
2) For every college you reject, be courteous enough to send them a formal letter of rejection. An exemplary letter might be as follows:
Dear Harvard Undergraduate Admissions,
Thank you for your letter of acceptance. However, upon careful examination of all the schools I was accepted to, it is with sincere regret that I am unable to commit to your school.
This year has been the most competitive year for college letters. I have received 16 letters of acceptance so far for my enrollment in various private institutions. Understand that this is in no way indicative of your worth as a school and I am sure that you will find a great number of bright undergraduates that will go far in their respective fields. With so many well rounded and prestigious institutions that gave me acceptance letters, I hope you can appreciate the difficulty I faced of selecting only one of them.
If you still wish to have me as a student, I would welcome a letter soliciting a potential transfer from the school I will be in at the time.
Best Wishes,
Jarrod Mock
Non-followers of Jarrod-ism say these exist, I'll take their word for it
Your saying of Jarrod-ism for the day: "Colleges don't reject me, I reject colleges"
Memorize It
Believe It
Spread It
Live It
Peace out,
J-rod
P.S. Regarding the frequency of posts, I will try to do at least one post per week but please be understanding if that is not always the case. After all, writing can't be forced.
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